Nay, we are but men. Rock!

Hello hello!

(cue music) Welcome to Epic Fail Friday!

I thought that I would introduce something not-so-random to our essentially stream-of-consciousness blog here.  Is there a better way to end the week?  I think not.

Epic Fail #1

Now normally, the only way a post like this would make it on a man blog is because of the title (I’ll take Famous Titles for $400, Alex….);  however, this post actually has something that we, as parents, can relate to (well, I suppose we could about the other anyway, because of that fact).

Well anyway, here is the link. Definitely SFW

What do you all think?

This is more of a post to make myself feel better.  Even though it is old, I hope you can get a couple laughs out of it, learning how to NOT fight.

I am happy–immensely happy, but at the same time, tragically, deeply anguished.  The perpetuation of my emotional dichotomy stems from the fact that my wife and I just found out that we were going to have another child.  That, in and of iteself, is mostly the source of my unbound joy; however, we also found out that we are not going to be the ones to raise our little one–that honor, in all its joy, belongs to Jesus.

You see, our little one was brought home from this world earlier than I ever could have imagined; I never would have thought that I could feel a part of me so barren, but so alive.  Not alive and blossoming with vivacity; rather, alive in the sense you get when you have a sudden, deep injury.  That part of me is rubbed so raw, bleeding, but feels so alive because of it.

I mourn the loss of my child, but how awesome would it be to be raised by God Himself? I mean, my dad was great, but he kinda pales in comparison.  Let’s see….a wooden house….or golden streets?  Which would you rather see every day? : )

Though it pains me that I will never be able to hold this baby, snuggle it in bed, sing it to sleep, and watch it grow, laugh, learn, and love, I do feel grateful knowing that my child is in the best of hands, and will be waiting there for me, welcoming me into the arms of the Father, who has raised my baby in His glorious perfection.

I am dying inside–but I rejoice in the Lord and all He has provided.

–Aaron

The Olympics are many things to many people; the hard work, the blood, sweat, and tears—all of that cliche stuff.

Also, this?

Looks like they wanted to keep lots of people from going home with more than a medal. If they didn’t, I imagine they would have to open up the ‘gold’ express lane at the clinic.

I guess the Olympics is all about love. Hah!

What man does not like a quality sound system?  Everyone loves their 5.1, 7.1, and 10.2 as much as the next guy (i guess they even have 22.2 working models now), and especially love the hardware they entail.  The smell of the new wafers inside the glossy black (hopefully black–do any real men buy any other color?) housing…..aaah…   I love the sound of crisp tweeters, deep mids, and rumbling subs, seeing the bright little LEDs blinking back at me, waiting for my discretionary selection (Billy Ray Cyrus, of course).

Ah, the glory of gold-plated cables & terminals and multi-unit remotes!

Anyway, I don’t know how many of you have had systems in your cars (I once had an 800-watt system in my car, that was worth more than my car–ohhh I love you Kicker) and have enjoyed the mobility of premium sound, but I have a news flash for you.  Your tricked-out cars are obsolete.  I have, for you, (I know you are drooling at the thought) the NEXT generation of mobile audio.  You can thank me later.

Here it is

Oh, and Billy Ray Cyrus was totally a joke.  You did get that, right?  Remember, this is a Man blog.

It was really David Hasselhof

You all know that I love bacon. It is the king of breakfast meats–it laughs in the face of Queen Italian Sausage (and her wicked stepsister Maple), while Jester Jimmy Dean whimpers in the corner, and Servant Ham shovels the latrine.

If I could, I would carry some in my pocket everywhere I go. Who am I kidding? I would take a bacon shower (only if it’s cooked first).

That said, here is a great way to start the perfect day! And by perfect day, I mean any that starts with bacon!

And I will never have to worry about burning my foot on the George Foreman again.

(Honey! Can you come rub Vaseline on my foot?!?)

You know a superhero.

I am tired of how fast they drive/run/fly, the star treatment they get, and the lucrative endorsement deals–they are vigilantes, and not above the law! They need to be stopped! To further this cause, I have painstakingly uncovered the lay identities of the following superheroes, so we can ALL know who they are!

Here, for the world to see, are the identities uses to fight crime, protect the innocent, and lay around the house on Saturdays.

First to be revealed: MATT!

Happy Happy?

Secondly–JASON!

No, really, he's the..uh..other....Hulk

Thirdly, we have LUKE!

Next time bleach your pits too..

Next, ladies and gentlemen, we have BEN!

Hgrrgfmgnf!!!

Actually, this is BEN!

Heeeyyyyy---Duffman!

And finally, AARON!

Well, he’s probably someone’s hero

Oh. man. I need one right now! (who doesn’t?)

Neighbor kids, LDS, Seventh-day Adventists, and girl scouts (I don’t really need those Thin Mints and Samoas anyway) beware!

I guess you all should call now before you come over

As advanced as BigDog is, it’s amazing to see where they got the technology…